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> Armedassault.info End of Days Superparty, Celebrating the end of the world since 476!
JdB
post Nov 13 2016, 00:09
Post #5481


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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 12 2016, 22:09) *
Why the everloving f*ck would anyone want to appear under so stupid a headline.


It's the dividing line where "whore" meets "attention-whore" and overlaps wink.gif

This post has been edited by JdB: Nov 13 2016, 00:09


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pMASTER
post Nov 13 2016, 00:21
Post #5482


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"Look mommy, look, it's that sperm-gobbling lady from the news!"


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JdB
post Nov 13 2016, 02:52
Post #5483


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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 13 2016, 00:21) *
"Look mommy, look, it's that sperm-gobbling lady from the news!"


Parent-teacher conferences become a lot more awkward.

Of course it does simplify the solution to the children receiving poor grades ...


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D@V£
post Nov 20 2016, 23:01
Post #5484


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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Gentlemen, I bring ill news.

Earlier this evening, a not unsignificant amount of beer was... *pained sob*... "Lifted up by the Valkyries" while in service of our moderation team. This tragedy, in a time of such hardship, can not- nay, must not be taken likely. So, let us all raise our glasses, and drink to the memory of drinks lost.

Temulentus pater, Sic transit gloria arcu.


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QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
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QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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pMASTER
post Nov 21 2016, 20:28
Post #5485


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In other words... you spilt a pint?


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D@V£
post Nov 21 2016, 22:33
Post #5486


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 21 2016, 19:28) *
In other words... you spilt a pint?

Well, when you put it that way, it doesn't sound quite so dramatic, but... yes...


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QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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JdB
post Nov 21 2016, 23:29
Post #5487


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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 21 2016, 20:28) *
In other words... you spilt a pint?


When he starts posting in Latin you know it's been considerably more than one.


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pMASTER
post Nov 22 2016, 03:17
Post #5488


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Oh, I did have a giggle right there. happy.gif Don't you worry.


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D@V£
post Nov 22 2016, 03:22
Post #5489


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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QUOTE(JdB @ Nov 21 2016, 22:29) *
When he starts posting in Latin you know it's been considerably more than one.

You people have no right to judge me! I'm not the one callously trying to make a joke over something as serious as split booze.

You insensitive bastards! cry3.gif

(Though, come to think of it, the whole Latinness being proportional to drunkenness thing would explain the Catholic church pretty well...)


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QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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pMASTER
post Nov 22 2016, 05:40
Post #5490


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No it wouldn't. Just consider how many drinking sessions the average priest would celebrate in a week! A goblet of wine here and there isn't going to unsettle him. biggrin.gif


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Wittmann
post Nov 22 2016, 07:51
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QUOTE(D@V£ @ Nov 21 2016, 09:01) *
Gentlemen, I bring ill news.

Earlier this evening, a not unsignificant amount of beer was... *pained sob*... "Lifted up by the Valkyries" while in service of our moderation team. This tragedy, in a time of such hardship, can not- nay, must not be taken likely. So, let us all raise our glasses, and drink to the memory of drinks lost.

Temulentus pater, Sic transit gloria arcu.



Noooooooooooooooooooo! *sobs* cry3.gif

Best have another. drunk.gif


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JdB
post Nov 22 2016, 20:48
Post #5492


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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 22 2016, 05:40) *
No it wouldn't. Just consider how many drinking sessions the average priest would celebrate in a week! A goblet of wine here and there isn't going to unsettle him. biggrin.gif


I read that wine consumption is twice as high in the Vatican as it is in the rest of Italy. So basically a clergyman's life consists of boozing and shagging. If it weren't for the little boys I would consider becoming a man of the cloth too naughty.gif


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D@V£
post Nov 22 2016, 23:58
Post #5493


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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QUOTE(JdB @ Nov 22 2016, 19:48) *
I read that wine consumption is twice as high in the Vatican as it is in the rest of Italy. So basically a clergyman's life consists of boozing and shagging. If it weren't for the little boys I would consider becoming a man of the cloth too naughty.gif

Yeah, you've got to take that with a pinch of salt, since micro-nations screw up statistics like that. For example, the Vatican city has the highest Papal density in the world, with over 5 Popes per square mile! If it expanded to the size of the Netherlands, it would be home to around 80,000 Popes!


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The Rules - Nothing too complicated, follow these and we'll have no problems.
Moderation Feedback Thread - Tell everyone how much you hate me love me secretly fear that Mark is watching you while you sleep. secretly wish that Mark is watching you while you sleep.
Site Issues Thread - Complain about site issues here. We might even fix them!
Community Chatter Thread - Furthest Mud-sling gets a free subscription to "JdB Monthly".

QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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JdB
post Nov 23 2016, 01:15
Post #5494


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QUOTE(D@V£ @ Nov 22 2016, 23:58) *
Yeah, you've got to take that with a pinch of salt, since micro-nations screw up statistics like that. For example, the Vatican city has the highest Papal density in the world, with over 5 Popes per square mile! If it expanded to the size of the Netherlands, it would be home to around 80,000 Popes!


Not to mention the number of antipopes.


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D@V£
post Nov 23 2016, 14:58
Post #5495


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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I'm greatly concerned about what would happen if the Pope and Antipope collided...

I couldn't find the weight of an average Pope, but by going on the human average, the theoretical "Holy C-Bomb" would be as powerful as 5.2 Teratonnes of TNT (over one hundred thousand times more powerful than the Tsar Bomba)


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The Rules - Nothing too complicated, follow these and we'll have no problems.
Moderation Feedback Thread - Tell everyone how much you hate me love me secretly fear that Mark is watching you while you sleep. secretly wish that Mark is watching you while you sleep.
Site Issues Thread - Complain about site issues here. We might even fix them!
Community Chatter Thread - Furthest Mud-sling gets a free subscription to "JdB Monthly".

QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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pMASTER
post Nov 24 2016, 03:20
Post #5496


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My concern depends on the hemisphere whereon they would collide.


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R.I.P. Jacky *1996-Ü2014
 
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D@V£
post Nov 24 2016, 15:26
Post #5497


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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QUOTE(pMASTER @ Nov 24 2016, 02:20) *
My concern depends on the hemisphere whereon they would collide.

Hemisphere is the right term.

Assuming our Popes collide in the Vatican, the fireball would be around 256km, big enough to completely atomize San Marino, and last around an hour and a half. The blast radius would reliably kill everyone in Milan, and would cause widespread destruction as far as Frankfurt. People as far as Boston (The one in the US, not the one in the UK) would receive 3rd degree burns.

And that's just the immediate effects.

So, we could talk about ecological collapse or the ice caps melting or something dull like that happening, but, since the Atlantic ocean has been vaporized by the heat of the explosion, we don't even need to bother. Anything that wasn't killed by the actual explosion will be steamed alive, locking in it's flavour and nutrition, while maintaining the usual degree of tenderness you'd expect from traditional boiling techniques.


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The Rules - Nothing too complicated, follow these and we'll have no problems.
Moderation Feedback Thread - Tell everyone how much you hate me love me secretly fear that Mark is watching you while you sleep. secretly wish that Mark is watching you while you sleep.
Site Issues Thread - Complain about site issues here. We might even fix them!
Community Chatter Thread - Furthest Mud-sling gets a free subscription to "JdB Monthly".

QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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JdB
post Nov 24 2016, 17:36
Post #5498


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QUOTE(D@V£ @ Nov 24 2016, 15:26) *
Anything that wasn't killed by the actual explosion will be steamed alive, locking in it's flavour and nutrition, while maintaining the usual degree of tenderness you'd expect from traditional boiling techniques.


... And we're back to chefs from the UK tiredsmiley.gif


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D@V£
post Nov 24 2016, 19:32
Post #5499


Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.
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QUOTE(JdB @ Nov 24 2016, 16:36) *
... And we're back to chefs from the UK tiredsmiley.gif

Oh, I'm sorry, is being steamed alive not cosmopolitan enough for you? You'd rather not be killing in a method that has the best painful:sexy:nutritious ratio?

I mean, granted, anything involving copious amounts of oil, like deep frying, is usually sexier, but that's just not as good for you. Boiling, while easy, is neither particularly sexy nor nutritious. Roasting is always a good call.

But... I know how you Frisian degenerates like things, you'd probably prefer being baked, right?


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The Rules - Nothing too complicated, follow these and we'll have no problems.
Moderation Feedback Thread - Tell everyone how much you hate me love me secretly fear that Mark is watching you while you sleep. secretly wish that Mark is watching you while you sleep.
Site Issues Thread - Complain about site issues here. We might even fix them!
Community Chatter Thread - Furthest Mud-sling gets a free subscription to "JdB Monthly".

QUOTE(Major Mike Shearer)
We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.
QUOTE(Brace Belden)
A machine gun is like a woman, I donít understand it, Iím afraid of it, and one day Iíll accidentally be killed by one.
 
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pMASTER
post Nov 24 2016, 23:11
Post #5500


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Who says that our popes would have to collide in Rome? If the explosion's epicenter was, say, in the midst of the Australian deserts, how far would the immediate destruction radius spread? Far enough to strike Mecca? I mean, Moscow? No, no, I mean, MŁhlenhof-Menzenrath? Can't stand those buggers! mad.gif


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